hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I'm like, not good at living.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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