We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Can you bring me the toilet please
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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