Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
