I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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