it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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