He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
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Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
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And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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