no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize