I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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