hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize