You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize