Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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