he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
