why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
