i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
