life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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