me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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