I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
