have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
