upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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