Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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