I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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