Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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