Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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