I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
two words: eviction party
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
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