she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I am full of burrito and curiosity
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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