kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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