i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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