We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Randomize