somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
