I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
