When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize