what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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