It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven