can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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