We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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