i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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