Jerry, you need to find god
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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