her vagine was all disorganized.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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