Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
