dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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