I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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