She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize