glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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