You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
