Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please