Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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