just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
