sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Randomize
