Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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