Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
